Late Night Musings

From time to time, I can't sleep. Sometime there's a reason, sometimes there's not. It's on these nights that I do enjoy just laying in my bed and writing. Tonight is one of those nights. I try and not distinguish between the nights where sleep escapes me for a reason or not, and I'll continue that practice tonight. I think that it wouldn't be fair to the handful of people who actually read what I write (yes, all three or four of you), as it would give away too much of what's going on in my mind. And where's the fun in that?

I like to listen to music as I write. Tonight the music is coming via YouTube. It's interesting to see record label's stations. Who would have guessed that Miley Cyrus and Breaking Benjamin were on the same label?

My boss commented on my music collection recently. If one were to review a list of my iTunes purchases over the last six months, they may wonder about my sanity. In my defense, some of the songs I bought were for specific purposes. I mean, to buy Danny Boy being sung by the Man in Black (and if you have to ask who that is, that that's just sad) would have to have a purpose (a colleague's 50th birthday). But, let's take a look at what's there:

Hockey Song - Vile Richard
It's a bunch of Canadians singing about hockey. I went to a hockey game last weekend, and that was a big deal for me, as it was my first NHL game.

I Wanna Drive the Zamboni - Martin Zellar
A song about the Zamboni. It's played at every hockey venue in the english speaking world. Plus, it got me excited for the hockey game.

Simple Gifts - Alison Krause and Yo-Yo Ma
I'd be hard pressed to find a more soothing voice than Alison Krause's. My job is such that, for the time being, I am facilitating on-job-training for people that I've facilitated formal training sessions for since June. They're wearing on my nerves, to put it mildly. Having something that can calm the mind for a few minutes is a good thing.

I'm Alright - Kenny Loggins
This is the Theme Song to the movie Caddyshack. It was a celebratory song played after the first successful payroll run of our new system.

Don't Think Twice - Mike Ness
Mike is the lead singer of Social Distortion, a So-Cal punk band that's been around for almost 20 years. But, even in Social D's songs, you can detect some country influences. On Mike's solo albums, you definitely hear the country influences. And, as can be found with many country songs, there's a story being told with the lyrics.

If I Should Fall from Grace with God and A Pair of Brown Eyes - The Pogues
The Pogues are a listed inspiration for most modern Irish Punk bands. They were the group that made Irish music cool to a younger generation. Kids from the 80's couldn't sit an listen to The Dubliners by themselves. But, have them listen to something by the Pogues first, then they would listen to see where it came from. The Pogues and The Dubliners even collaborated on a version of The Irish Rover.

Up, Something Beautiful, and Fortune's Favour - Great Big Sea
These albums by this Canadian band provided both upbeat songs about fishing, sailing, pirating, and drinking while also providing plenty of ballads to calm the frayed nerves, but can also put on in a reflective mood. It's a double-edged sword.

I Heard a Voice (Live) - AFI
I'm a sucker for live music. I could bypass most band's studio albums if I could just get one or two good live albums out of them. I'm not a diehard AFI fan, but it was a good live album with some songs I recognized and liked.

The General's Boombox - Street Dogs
"You lit the fire in us, and we play on in your trust." Motivation is an interesting subject. Why do we do what we do? Is it for us? For someone else? Will that someone else know why we acted the way we did? Do we expect our actions to have some sort of affect on other people? There's a reason behind everything.

Daylight - Matt & Kim
This was the song in the Bacardi commercial that takes a guy from one era to another while he's just trying to get a mojito. It's a catchy little tune, and it just sounds cool. No other real reason for this one.

Indian Summer - Carbon Leaf
I really only wanted one song, but figured I'd give the album a try (and I liked what I heard). My favorite song is What About Everything? Life is full of thoughts and questions, and this song points a number of them out. But, we will finally reach a point where we'll just look at those thoughts and questions and just say to ourselves "Forget it!" We'll become so fed up with worrying about things so much that we'll let the worries go and finally live life.

The Red Sox Album - The Boston Pops
No one that knows me should questions this one at all. Go Sox!

Fatty - Street Dogs
I made a few Street Dogs purchases, but a few months apart. I've never been a small kid. Now, I really put on weight after my dis-enrollment from ROTC my junior year at UA, but even in high school I was a big kid. I was tall and played football on the O-Line. The only reason that I wasn't openly picked on was because I was an athlete, but my self-perception has not been good for many years, and it's catching up with me now. I can relate to the kid in this song. "Do you remember, back in High School, that kid we all picked on? No one backed him, ever liked him. He carries that with him today."

Mekong - Refreshments
Some days, you just wish you were at a bar, getting hammered to the point of oblivion, talking about all of your cares and worries with some stranger that is also getting smashed. The best part is that they won't know if you're telling the truth or not "Flip a coin, what shall we talk about. Heads, I tell the truth and Tails, I lie." But the overarching message of the song can be summed up in the chorus "And is it true it's always Happy Hour here? And if it is, I'd like to say a while. And as cliche as it may sound, I'd like to raise another round, and if your bottle's empty, help yourself to mine. Thank you for your time, and Here's to Life!"

Making the most of life is something that I've tried to focus on recently. Being one's own harshest critic doesn't allow for much allowance of mistakes and miscues. So, when you spend four years on something that doesn't end up working out, it's easy to get down on yourself and not let yourself get back up off the mat. I had to make a conscious effort to let myself get back up, to put myself out there a little bit, to chance rejection for the opportunity of acceptance. To make new friends and become closer to people that you've known for a long time. The hardest part is allowing yourself to think that you may actually find love while trying not to force that issue. It's a balancing act that you're trying to perform right after you've lost your ability to balance. It's tough, but the farther I get from the previous setback, the easier it gets to move on with my life. I'm now to the point where I feel like the world is telling me "So close your eyes and embrace your memories. Leave your troubles and your worries far behind. Stop contemplating. Start celebrating. You gotta live before you die." (from Social D's song Live Before you Die)

Thus Sayeth Your Haus